an open letter to anyone with ED or struggling with food

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Let me start by just saying that you are not alone. I feel like everyone in this society, more or less, is struggling with the diet culture. Whether or not they have an eating disorder, people are wrestling with food thoughts all the time. “Should I have an extra cookie today?” “I have been eating “junks” all week, I need to fast over the weekend!” “I don't know if I can eat this today, let me check how many calories it has”. 

Companies take advantage of us by creating weight-loss products or “healthy”  meal deliveries. Advertisements mislead our definitions of health and change our perspective of food. Social media imposes an ideal body image in our brain, making ourselves feel shitty for not meeting its standards.  

Each body is different, and each individual needs to tailor their dietary journey to better health through experience, trial and error, and intuition.

Don’t feed the diet industry beast and let it dominate the world!

Another thing I want to cover is that I’ve officially finished my 21-day challenge of ED behaviors. Yay…

I couldn’t have done this without ignoring all the outside voices and inner critiques. Getting rid of certain apps definitely helps. Switching the channel upon seeing triggering ads does so as well. The bottom line is that until you are completely in control, some outside force might help! I was so against this idea before on my journey of recovery. I hated the idea of having other people monitoring me. What am I? A criminal? But changing this mindset is crucial when you are struggling with something because no one owes you anything. They are simply trying to help. It might be better for them to do something else entertaining rather than keeping you accountable for the goal you’ve made. So take advantage of the external encouragements and add it to your internal fight. In the end, it is your choice, but the influence of others who care about you can help guide you in the right direction.

Monitoring and changing my thought process was the first step. It wasn’t until I started being comfortable with occupying the space that my body takes up in the world did my mind begin to heal. It took a few days to make peace with the few pounds I’ve gained. After the cognitive healing, the eating came second. The eating was only able to happen because my mind started healing first. I’ve heard the phrase so many times that the solution to ED is to just EAT. Hell no. It will only lead you to other problems without attacking the roots of them all. Rewiring the brain will open you up to a whole new world and keep you out of dysfunctional thinking. 

Have patience and give yourself time!